letting_go

The Cyrus Mistry / Tata Sons fiasco of last week set me thinking.

Want another example. Look at the current situation in UP and TN. There is a father – son tussle and in TN there is a nonagenarian who just does not want to hand over the baton.

Sporting heroes over stay , corporate honchos overstaying their time and  I can add many more things to this list.

Families, I see the same. Parents cannot let go of their children and  vice-versa.

Generally seem to be prevalent every sphere of life.

I have no kind of credibility to comment or take a position on this.

I see a common pattern and in my view the root cause is ‘Letting Go’.

I see we just cannot ‘Let go’.

I wanted to take stock on if I would “Let Go” and  to be honest to my own self , I will fail the test.

Here are some examples

My wife tells me that I am a back seat driver. I give her something to do and I keep nagging her till the task is done and bugging her on how the task is done.

I keep calling up my erstwhile peers, mentors, and keep harassing them, despite them giving me a grand send off . I can see the pain on the tone of their voices, but their karma makes them take my call or return the call. Well , 95% of them do return the calls. 5% are bold enough to break their karma cycle!

I send my kids on all kind of errands and once they are back ask them to de-brief every bit on how they did the errand.

Everyone of you would have heard this story which is possibly worth repeating

A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no farther.

Then the man decided to help the butterfly, so he took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterfly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shrivelled wings.

The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body which would contract in time.

 

Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shrivelled wings. It never was able to fly.

What this man in his kindness and haste did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were nature’s way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.

Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If nature allowed us to go through your life without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as strong as what we could have been. And we could never fly….

I am not sure how many wings I would have crippled or crippling, out of my  need for benign indulgence.

However recently in one incident I did ‘let go’.

As most of you know, I currently call myself a reasonably successful talent broker taking a zero percent commission.  Last one year I have managed some courtships and marriages.

I have this unique insight about matching talent , opportunity and most importantly the perceived emotional connect that both parties will have in future.

So I was naturally upset when one of this broking opportunities went south sometime back and I wanted to go berserk on one of the parties. But somehow I exercised unusual restraint and told to myself “Zunder . Hold your judgement and respect the individual’. You are just a gateway. No more. No less”

After couple of days I felt good about having exercised that restrained and ‘Let go’ of my judgement and I hold no kind of remorse and feel no change in my attitude towards the party with whom I wanted to go berserk.

“One swallow does not make a summer make”, but that I could let go is a revelation to myself.

I just wish I would be able to ‘Let go’ in many spheres of life so that many butterflies could fly and since now I am increasingly aware, my percentage of letting go just might increase.

Eckhart Tolle puts it well

“Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on”

what about you ?

Have you experienced ‘Let Go’

or

Will you ‘Let Go’ when your moment arrives ?

Enjoy Maadi (Have Fun)

Zunder

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