Continuing on from where I left off last week, it is important to possibly answer the ‘Why’. I am repeating that these are my own feelings shared for God knows what. I think I might make some sense in the end if you endure through this.
I botched up a sabbatical opportunity during 2013. I had signed up for the ‘Teach for India’ program, got through it, despite they selecting younger lot of people. The great people at my office consented for the sabbatical, but I chickened out at the last minute.
I have been fortunate enough to be with a very good set of people who cheered me despite my many short comings. They consoled my chickening out and set the course for me to move on.
I did continue with my usual energy, but somewhere, something started to linger in my head. It is not the quintessential question of ‘Who am I’ , but ‘What Am I really made of?’ and in a year I had come up with the following list
- My position in the organization, demanded someone who can make radical improvements and not incremental ones. In a way, I realized this before I was made to realize this !
- My team demanded a new leader who can give them a fresh perspective of technology and life
- The stalwarts in my team needed a way to see they could grow
And above all, I needed to discover the answer to ‘Why did I chicken out’ ?
I consulted my then boss and a good mentor as well , Mao (Manoranjan Mohopatra), and he was kind enough to give me an extremely large window possibly to test the resolve of my decision. On my repeated nudging, he possibly understood that this time around I have passed his test of showing resolve, he set me a date of mid 2015 and granted me a gracious exit, promising all kinds of help in anything I wanted personally and professionally. I do reach out to him occasionally and get the necessary support.
John Wooden, the legendary basket ball coach, writes
“Be more concerned with your character than with your reputation. Your character is what you really are while your reputation is merely what others think you are.”
So in short, I think the Why is to discover
‘What is my own character?’ and to be true to myself, I guess I am on a bouncy wicket.
I came across an increasing video forward on whatsapp and enclosing it below.
The video is a nice little talk on ‘Remember, who you are’
I think I get the Styrofoam part of it now. I did not realize it when I was being given a royal send off and I shall write about that in the next edition.
Enjoy Maadi. (Have Fun)
Zunder
Random Thoughts 
Liked the styrofoam cup. Just paraphrasing what Prof. Venky Ramakrishanan had to say when he visited NCBS a few years back. That he visited the same venue the previous year (or a year back) before he was bestowed with the most recognized prize in the planet and there was hardly one who bothered to attend his lecutre except for the students of the subject. (Every thing changed.. it might also change to the same..)
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IMHO, I feel that there are people out there who continue to treat us with ceramic cup even when we don’t hold the position. They are family, friends and the people whose lives were touched by our character (out of love for them).
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Rightly said, the ceramic cup is for the position. Character of the position and character of the person. The character as a person is something that make others to perceive us rightly. Character may be the yanthra of our wisdom to connect with rest…
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Dear Zunder
I think I need to read your carpet per dime or Carpe Diem to put my memories in perspective. As you know I was heading the HR for Integra and it was during 2004-2006, when the hiring was at its zenith! I visited one of the budding engg. college in South India and the person managing the group of institutions was a man of strong values, well grounded and was “aware” of ‘what and why’ he was doing a thing!
Like the speaker said in this video, we were received in the Rly station(5.30 am), taken to a very good hotel, someone waiting on us till we got ready, finished our breakfast and brought us to the campus. As our car entered the portico, I was about to get down. Some attendants stopped me from getting down. I did not understand. But tired due to lack of sleep, I accepted wholeheartedly. Few minutes later, I saw an elderly gentlemen (because of complete white hair),with a streak of vibhudhi in his contrasting forehead, very energetic, physically fit and with a big smile, walking briskly towards our car. As he neared, the person who stopped me, opened the car, this elderly gentlemen shook my hands and handed me a small bouquet of flowers. I was taken aback by this reception, but was also happy for the kind of reception I got.
As I walked through the corridor towards his office, I found more than 20 – 25 people patiently waiting at that time of the day to see him. I immediately realised the person’s stature and his importance. As we settled in his room, the first thing I told him, “Sir! You should not have come out to receive us.” He asked “Why?”. I told him, “Firstly you are elder to me! I should come to you than you to me! Secondly If I come to your institute as an ordinary person tomorrow and not as HR – Head of Integra, I will be the 26th person waiting outside to see you! Hence I realise this reception and honour is for my position and not for me! I will be glad if anything extended to me out of love and respect for me and not for my position, and that would be permanent!” He was silent for a moment. Then said, “We will meet after this campus selection. I need to discuss a lot of things with you!”
From that day a deep friendship started between us. When he calls or I call, we pick up each other’s call immediately. The college has grown into a very reputed university. It has got all the branches of education it can provide in today’s world. This person heads all!
Our friendship is very precious and wonderful. We do not speak much, but we speak sense. When we speak, it looks as if we are continuing from where we left. Above all, now, “He personally comes to receive me!” every time I go to his place! We have one meal together!
To summarize, while we should not own the ceramic cup, we need not bring ourselves down to Styrofoam cup too. Let us accept what we are anchoring in reality and not get anchored in our positions or authority!
Thanks again for making me write!
t.k.ramesh
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You should write more to a wider audience.
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